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Choose A Lifestyle That Makes You Happy

By: Dennis Harting

It is always interesting to watch how society attempts to make people conform. Social conditioning is one of the most powerful motivators we encounter. The fact that most of it occurs without our knowledge is what makes it so effective. People will fight to defend their beliefs without even being aware of where those ideas came from. Unfortunately, the majority of us are nothing more than "products of our environment". We rarely become something that we consciously chose. Rather, those who we spent the most time with influenced us into believing what we do.

When it comes to relationships and sex, society is clear on what it's belief is. Heterosexual marriage is the accepted model. This is the best way to maintain order while ensuring the reproduction of the "village". People who enter this state end up raising a family which carries the population forward. Also, married couples provide an overall stability to the community. They tend to settle down in an area while establishing some roots. The focus often shifts away from individual fulfillment to that of the family. It is a wonderful concept and appropriate in most situations.

However, there are a large number of people who are not designed for this lifestyle. Yet society fails to deliver the message that it is alright for one to find a lifestyle that is suitable to him or her. Many believe that if someone is not of this mold, then there must be something wrong. Yet, there are many different lifestyles for people to choose from.

Of course, there is the choice of staying single. For a lot of people, this is the ideal way to live life. Some people are homosexual or bisexual. Their preference strays a bit from the norm. Then there are those who prefer the "swinging" lifestyle. Monogamy is not something that works for them. These are just a few of the choices people can make when deciding what they want in life.

Part of living a rich life is making the choices that make you happy. Too many people allow others to make the decisions for them and wonder why they are not fulfilled. You are the only one who has to live your life. It is imperative that you select those things that coincide with your true nature.

Attempting to live a lifestyle that is not true to us will result in failure. We have heard of the man who leaves his wife for another man. He comes "out of the closet". Afterwards, people wonder why he would do such a thing. The answer is that he simply was trying to live a lifestyle that did not fit him. Certainly he may not have known his sexual preference when he got married. Nevertheless, the pressures of our culture deter the investigation into what fits this individual. He was trained from a young age that he should get married and raise a family. That is the conditioning of society.

Naturally, this is not to imply that there is anything wrong with marriage or family. The point is that basically they are not for everyone. However, the judgments of others is another powerful weapon. People who fail to obey the cultural norm are belittled. For example, what is the opinion of people who engage in group sex. The majority of society looks down upon those people. They call them all kinds of names. Individuals who claim to be "open-minded" judge the daylights out of these people. Since they do not fit into the proper model, weapons are brought out in an attempt to make them conform. Naturally, violence is outlawed in the era so other tactics are utilized. The biggest is to let people know they "do not fit in". This carries considerable pressure. We all want to be a part of something. Our humanness dictates this. Man (in the species sense) is a social animal. We are designed to interact with other people.

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